Sunday, October 28, 2012

Working Mom Guilt

It was bound to happen sooner or later. It took six months but the guilt has officially set in.

I will say first off, I don't mind working- Most days at least. I like to have my own income and I am very aware of the fact that in order to keep up our current lifestyle, it is important that I do bring in some sort of income. I don't have a job that I loathe like a lot of people I know. And to be quite honest I am not sure I have what it takes to be a full time SAHM. (Hats off to you ladies)

I can not begin to tell you how many people have told me how sorry for me they are because I "have to work". I'm not going to lie, it's a little bit offensive. For the record- overall, most days I don't feel like I "have to work." It is a choice I have made that is best for my family. I know this, I KNOW THIS, however that sneaky mom-guilt has set in...

My baby had her first cold last week. She was so congested and couldn't breathe out of her tiny nose and all I wanted to do was stay home with her all day but instead I had to go to work. There is that "have to". I despise that "have to". I long for flexibility that being a full time working mom does not afford. And tomorrow, BGT has her 6 month check up and again, I won't be there which makes me sad.

I ask myself am I short changing us both by being a working mom? My mother worked until I was about 4.5 when my youngest sister was born and I have very few fleeting memories of her not being a SAHM. I don't feel short changed or like I am permanently scarred from spending my first years in daycare so what makes me think Bennett Grace is going to be? She stays with my mom full time. Next to me I can say hands down there is no place I would rather her be. So why do I keep asking myself the same questions? Constantly reconsidering my decisions? MOM GUILT. That's why.

I am not sure if the guilt is here to stay or something that comes and goes but for now it's here and I want it to go.

(On a separate note- Apologies in the state of my blog design- I should not be trusted to try to do anything other than write a simple post and leave the blog design to the professionals. I don't know what I did or how I did it but unless I can figure it out soon its here to stay)


  1. I can totally relate! We are blessed to have my sister and MIL keep Gage but it's still not mommy! I WANTED to be the mom that just COULD NOT stay at home and I was hoping by the time I went back to work I would be ready. But I wasn't, and I so COULD stay at home:( I struggle with it everyday. I hate missing his sweet face! But like you said, my mom stayed at home and I honestly don't even remember her staying home! Babies will love their mommies no matter what:) Guilt is normal, but I hear it gets better... we'll see;)

  2. I too deal with mommy guilt at times but it has gotten better as Cooper got bigger. Of course I will deal with it all over again when #2 arrives.

  3. I think you are an amazing Mommy and I look up to you more than you will ever know. Bennett Grace is so blessed to have such wonderful parents. I am so thankful to have you in my life and look so forward to watching BG and Cooper grow and learn together! It's going to be a blast!:)

    Love you.